If It Works, You Did It; If It Doesn't Work, Blame Somebody
The self-serving bias gets you to believe that everyone is responsible for your failures, except you.
There is so much that we can learn from children about our own selfishness and negative traits if we allow ourselves the humility to learn.
I have been around children a lot of late. And while a lot of things stand out for me, one thing I noticed about them is that children will never take responsibility for spoiling things and will always be the first to take credit for making something happen.
A child will blame the wind, or ojuju calabar for spilling water on the carpet and will take credit for opening a jar of milk, even though all it did was clap for daddy as he opened the jar.
Children soon become adults and if not curtailed, those children will blame their misfortunes on everybody and everything else, and will always take credit for their successes, regardless of the circumstances. It is why you have a lot of adults who say things like “I did it on my own,” although, in truth, nobody ever really does anything on their own. What they are suffering from, is a self-serving cognitive bias.
Self-serving bias
According to Verywellmind, the “Self-serving bias is how social psychologists describe humans’ tendency to blame external forces when bad things happen and to give ourselves credit when good things happen. Although it can mean evading personal responsibility for your actions, self-serving bias is a defence mechanism that protects your self-esteem.”
“In many cases, this cognitive bias allows you to protect your self-esteem. By attributing positive events to personal characteristics, you get a boost in confidence. By blaming outside forces for failures, you protect your self-esteem and absolve yourself from personal responsibility. Several factors have been shown to influence the self-serving bias, including age and gender. Older adults tend to make more internal attributions, that is, credit themselves for their successes. Men are more likely to make external attributions, meaning they tend to blame outside forces for their failures.”
“Often when a person is depressed or has low self-esteem, this kind of bias may be reversed: they’ll attribute positive outcomes to outside help or even luck, and blame themselves when bad things happen.”
There are a lot of factors responsible for this bias, especially the community a child is raised in, which includes the child’s parents, teachers, friends, and neighbours.
While self-serving bias might be harmful, in that it creates a sense of faux pride which builds mental laziness, especially in taking responsibility, it has one positive side too. If someone truly believes that their failure is not a result of their own handiwork, they may be more motivated to try again and see if they can get the opportunity, after eliminating what they might have blamed for the reason.
But like all cognitive biases, we should be careful to not get consumed by them.
TEA
Best in verification
My Twitter account was verified mid-week and I had a couple of DMs about how to apply for verification. Firstly, you don’t have to pay anybody to get verified. Twitter recently started verification of ‘notable accounts on a rolling basis, so everyone can apply for verification from their profile settings.
To apply, visit this link and follow the instructions depending on the category you fall into. That’s all.
This week, I am going to take responsibility for my actions. I will work hard and mark, and ensure that I acknowledge my mistakes, learn from them, so I can become a better person.
Have a great week, my friend.
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Be nice to other people, smile as much as you can, and live freely. Have a great week.
If It Works, You Did It; If It Doesn't Work, Blame Somebody
I am going to take responsibility for my actions too.
Thank you for this sir❤
You have done well Mo. May Allah increase your knowledge and wisdom