Why Is It Difficult To Quit, Despite Obviously Unfavourable Odds?
The more you have invested, the less you are likely to take the immediate exit. Here is why
I fell into what was supposed to be a romantic encounter but it ended up being a lopsided entanglement. In plain English, I fell in love but it did not work out. But you know what I did? I stuck around.
What happened in my case was that I had invested quite a lot of conversations, effort, and commitment into that particular affair that it was easier to stay and “see what happens,” than to run out of it almost immediately.
Like me, several other people fall into situations where they struggle to leave because they have made some commitment to that situation. In the professional variant of it, you will find many people sticking to a bad job because they have committed a lot to it (maybe move to a new city, or bought some new appliances to work effectively) and instead of leaving, they consider what they have spent (time and money) to be there, so they stick around just a little bit, hoping that the outcome will be favourable. It usually doesn’t end up favourably.
If you have found yourself in a situation like this, then you have experienced the Sunk Cost fallacy.
SKF
The sunk cost fallacy means that we are making irrational decisions because we are factoring in influences other than the current alternatives. The fallacy affects a number of different areas of our lives leading to suboptimal outcomes.
In a TIME article, the concept was defined more clearly. It reads: “The sunk cost effect is the general tendency for people to continue an endeavour, or continue consuming or pursuing an option, if they’ve invested time or money or some resource in it,” says Christopher Olivola, an assistant professor of marketing at Carnegie Mellon’s Tepper School of Business and the author of a 2018 paper on the topic published in the journal Psychological Science. “That effect becomes a fallacy if it’s pushing you to do things that are making you unhappy or worse off.”
This fallacy can be replicated in personal lives, professional settings, romantic relationships, friendships, and even in ‘enmity’.
What do you do when you catch yourself slacking?
Quit.
Of course I know that quitting is difficult when you are in situations like this. Trust me, I have had to talk myself to sleep, write notes on the wall, and even used the carrot and stick method to correct myself at times when I have indulged instead of give up. So, I do understand that it is difficult but it is the safer thing to do.
Why?
Christopher Olivola explains that “There’s nothing you can do to regain money that’s lost — and pursuing something that makes you unhappy not only isn’t going to get your money back, but it’s also going to make you worse off. You’re just digging a deeper hole.”
The bad job/relationship/frendship/allyship will likely not get better. It is a smarter option to count your losses and move on. It is better to fall at the base than at the top. Quit and start over elsewhere.
TEA
There is a drop of fire on the mountain. I am starting to like going outside and being around people (of course, I will only talk to a few friends but me, tolerating crowds ???). In the last week, I worked remotely and constantly found myself looking forward to going out or being around people. To tackle this “quarter life crisis,” I started taking very long strolls/jogs. But the music and the alone-ness did not find peace until I went out with my friend on Saturday.
No, I still struggle to jump into conversations with strangers or to ‘engage’ people at random. But I am craving the ‘outside’ a little bit too much and it is unsettling. Is this how I will become an extrovert whose happy place is now in trying out cuisines and rating places? (oh wait, I already rate places for Google maps!)
The enemies shall not win. Pray for my soul that I start to find peace in being indoors, by myself (or with very close friends). Otherwise… hmm…
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Absolutely love this ✨💪.
🤗🤗🤗